Make Your Moai

Looking for a little more happiness in your life? May I suggest a Moai (mo-eye). Neither food nor drink, I am talking about a circle of friends.

Moai are a longevity tradition on the Japanese island of Okinawa, one of 5 Blue Zones – areas of long life and health. It seems that prioritizing social connection is a superfood. And one way to do so is in a Moai.

These are groups of 5-7 people (rarely more) who commit over a lifetime to spending regular time together. That’s it. Time together simply for the sake of getting together. Over time – perhaps a regular walk or a healthy meal, they become a reliable source of laughter, advice and help when needed. Consistency and a sense of belonging. There’s more on them here.

To my great surprise and delight, I realized this morning that I’m part of a sort of Moai that I hadn’t recognized as such. Early in the pandemic, a group of geographically far-flung college friends reconnected in a group chat, occasionally by Zoom, but mostly through a string of witty, wise and deeply supportive texts. One intrepid connector pulled us together and somehow along the way the interconnection grew. If more than a few days go by, someone in the group reaches out to pick back up. There are recipes, much laughter, photos, great insight and very powerful moments of shared understanding and camaraderie at life’s deepest twists and turns.

Does this Moai meet all of the Blue Zone criteria? Probably not, because avoiding screen time is a principle of Blue Zone A+ Status, however, I’m going to object and make an exception. Why? Because – virtual or not – I’ve felt this Moai’s positive impact on my being. I smile, feel buoyed, understood. It adds ripples of social interaction that enrich my life. I’d imagine that is the point of the Moai. I mean this must be good for my health! The only thing left for me to do is claim this group chat as a Moai and I’ve just boosted my lifespan by a decade (give or take!).  Wait until I share this on the group chat!.

As more introvert than extrovert, this kind of Moai structure works great. I do love connection (as we all do in our own unique ways) and I need lots of recharge. Turns out I have another Moai in my life – it is childhood friends who stand by through thick and thin – they too need to get this branding update!

This creates opportunity for us all. How can you incorporate this idea into your life? Where do you have a Moai just waiting to be named? Or, if not immediately obvious, where are there some simple seeds of acquaintance and connection that could be nurtured intentionally into a regular habit? Also possible to start from a clean slate and build something brand new. Sure, a ‘true’ moai is 5 people (but I bent the rules with a virtual version, right?), so why not starting with one person? Someone to regularly and intentionally share a laugh, an update and see where it goes.

Have fun – enjoy – and cheers!